My ebony submissive side and my femininity are interconnected. I like to nurture my feminine energy, because being in masculine mode – being a femdom – can drain and rob women of precious and sacred energy. There are times when I love hearing the words “get on your knees, princess,” from the right dominant. Therein lies the problem. Women who switch, have to be very careful who they switch with. There are men who really have no love for women whatsoever and will do us harm if given the opportunity. There are men who hate black women especially. Sure, they emulate us, fetishize us, and appropriate everything from our hair to how we talk, and simultaneously hate us. Misogynoire is very real, and if we’re not careful, being an ebony submissive can put us in danger. I am speaking from my perspective, because I am a black woman, and I do like switching when I am able to do so, but this applies to women as a whole: be careful who you submit to.
Ebony Submissive And Misogynoire
When I am tired and burned out from cracking the proverbial whip, I like to lay down my mantle and hand someone else the reigns. There is a liberation that goes along with not being in control, and with the right dominant, the experience puts me in an orgasmic, and very relaxed subspace. I have found that switches make great partners for that reason, but not all. If you are thinking about switching, I would ask you to make sure you have an important conversation with your potential dominant, about boundaries, safety, and seriously get in their head to find out if they are healthy enough mentally to take that role.
Wannabes And Fake Doms
There are men that target submissives specifically to harm them mentally, emotionally and sometimes physically if it gets that far. There are men that will project their insecurities onto women and seek to harm them. I will say that if a man flat out tells you he’s a misogynist, you need to run. If he even hints at dislike or disrespect for women, run. And if a man shows signs of misogynoire, do not pass go, get the hell out of there. If a man gaslights, talks over you, or doesn’t listen to you, that is not the type of man you want to submit to. And never trust any so called dom that sweet talks you in the beginning, and then starts to show signs that he is toxic. They are the worst of the worst, and they will break you down and stress you out and convince you that this is what you wanted. That’s not domination, that’s abuse. Unfortunately it is abuse I’ve experienced and was lucky enough to get the hell out of.
Sexual Exploitation Of An Ebony Submissive
These unhealthy men, are usually only looking for an ego boost, and some “thing” to nut in. And men do not have to like you, to fuck you. I would also like to include male subs in taking caution, because there are so called doms who prey on both sexes and for different reasons. Sexual desire, is not equivalent to sincere interest. A man can want you sexually, and not give a fuck about you other than that you are able to fulfill his surface needs, and as time passes, these men can become violent. They will also have no issue neglecting your emotional needs.
Ebony Femdom Style
If you take a look at my posts, I cater to what I call reverse raceplay. This might be light to extreme depending on the sub. It can be sensual and catering to satisfying my needs. One thing I will never do, is put another human being in harms way. I am here to educate you, train you, and give you the experience you desire, but I will not do anything that causes a person to harm themselves. I do.. believe in tough love, and I do NOT.. tolerate anyone’s bs. But where your fantasy is concerned, I will make you my bitch, and if it is your wish to be humiliated, that wish will be granted.
I want to be clear that I offer a service that is popular with white males, and cuckolds, that does not mean that I hate all men, or all white men. Some of my best friends are white.. isn’t that what some of yall white folks say when you don’t want to appear racist? In truth, I will converse with, and engage with anyone, regardless of what color you are. But if you want reverse raceplay, that’s what we’re going to do. And just in case you were unaware, reverse racism is not a thing, and does not exist. It only exists in fantasy.
Ebony Submissive Style
There is a myth, that black women are not submissive; incapable of being such. The reasons you don’t see many black women subs, isn’t because they don’t exist. It’s because of the environment in which black women have been placed, and the responsibilities placed on us, which leave many black women no time to nurture their feminine. Those of us who are rediscovering our feminine and submissive nature, have to be weary of men who benefit from us being in the opposite role, and who have no interest in taking care of us. If a man doesn’t want you to work, demands that you spend all of your time with him doing what he wants, but has not offered to provide for you emotionally or financially, I’m sorry ladies, that man means you harm.
Men are naturally providers, even submissive men will go out of their way to make sure their Domme is comfortable and pampered. A dominant man has the added responsibility of ensuring the submissives safety as well as being a provider. Toxic men will not care to make sure you are safe or comfortable, and will often put a sub in damaging situations where they are left cleaning up the mess. Black women do not often put themselves in submissive roles because many times we cannot afford to. Nor can we afford to be careless if we decide this is something we want to do.
As a submissive I prefer sensual domination and light bdsm. There are roads I would love to journey down, but have not, because trust is a priority. Mental health is a priority, and I cannot be submissive if I feel that myself or someone else is in danger, because when I’m not submissive I am a caregiver who is relied upon.
I don’t do raceplay when I’m submissive under any circumstances. That means I will not consent to anyone degrading me or calling me the n word. Not even if you paid me double, would I let a white person call me that. I also will not allow any non-black person to use that word in my presence. You don’t need to say it, or use it in any form, and if you see black people using the n word, your responsibility is to mind your business.
Misogynistic Men And Abuse
If any man is verbally abusive to you, and you haven’t discussed that being a part of your kink (some women do enjoy verbal humiliation), you need to get the fuck away from them. Because that verbal abuse can turn into emotional, and physical abuse. Submissives are the ones who have the real control, because submissives have to consent to what is agreed on. If a dominant male implies you have no rights, or tries to control you past what is realistic in order to function, you are dealing with a predator.
Vetting Dominant Men
I require a very lengthy vetting process for a dominant. In otherwords, I am not kneeling for some clown ass that I just met 2 minutes ago. Anyone who does not agree to get to know me and discuss my needs first is out. I don’t mind being open about my “ebony submissive” experiences. I met someone who – after a month of barely speaking, asked me to be their sub – I was blindsided and fell for the “sweet talk.” That relationship lasted two weeks. After the person increasingly became more demanding and verbally abusive when I would not comply, and kept complaining about my work getting in the way of him using me, yet made no attempt to provide for me. It wore on my mental health and I started having panic attacks. The final insult was having to cut off all communication with them. And even then they still tried to contact me.
Their initial reason for seeking me out, was because they were sexually attracted to me, and interested in objectifying me, regardless of my wellbeing. I am very cautious of men, because of this. Because of the men that only see black women as fuckable sex objects. I hope this sheds some light on why racism, misogyny, and being disrespected by any non-black person, is an important subject for me to educate people on. And why I am sensitive to that. There are some really fucked up men outchea, that wish to harm black women.
Submissive Roleplay
If you want to roleplay with me as the ebony submissive, I first need to know where you are going with it, before I agree to it. I like when people ask me questions instead of assuming they know what they’re doing. The best way to find out if we can play, is by calling me. 1-800-601-6975 is the number to call. Duchess Willow is who you ask for. Stay blessed.
Duchess Willow
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